| More and more plaintiffs and trial lawyers are chasing | | | | property owner. Burglar attacks man who shoots in |
| unconscionable quick buck pay-offs, using con man | | | | self-defense and kills him. The man's family sues |
| tactics. Which came first, pillage or burn? This seems | | | | property owner, and even though district attorney |
| to be the the question asked by these people in | | | | has declared the shooting justified, wins the case. |
| going to court. | | | | Illogical? The whole thing sounds about as likely as |
| Is it the water, something they're smoking? Or, is it | | | | peanut butter sliding off toast. |
| just plain, blind greed played out to a ridiculous | | | | > A group of rowdies drive around throwing lit |
| extreme? Whatever the reason, frivolous law suits, | | | | fireworks from a car window. A rocket explodes |
| pursued by supposedly mentally-stable people, have | | | | inside the car, and the car rental agency is sued. |
| literally gone through the roof of the U.S. court | | | | Outcome? Who knows? Still pending. Former |
| system. After reading the following sampler, you | | | | Attorney General, Janet Reno, said it best, "I always |
| decide whether this more represents the American | | | | wait until a jury has spoken before I anticipate what |
| system of jurisprudence--or the Twilight Zone, | | | | they will do." |
| featuring a cast of con man players. | | | | > Lottery winner says his winnings were impaired |
| > The Chicago Cubs sue freeloaders who watch their | | | | because the vendor didn't explain there was a cap on |
| baseball games through holes in their Wrigley Field | | | | winnings. The court rules in his favor. The jury must |
| fence. This violates their copyright it's claimed. This | | | | have felt that upholding the rights of downtrodden |
| sounds like a legal case filed by Goliath against David. | | | | lottery winners was an important constitutional issue. |
| > In San Francisco a teen throws herself off the | | | | > Man who had legally changed his name to "Jack |
| Golden Gate Bridge. This violates the teen's | | | | Ass" sues MTV for $50,000,000, claiming that their |
| constitutional right not to be deprived of life without | | | | series, "jackass" disparages his "good name.." This |
| due process of law, is the charge of her mother in a | | | | shows that just about anybody can become a |
| law suit filed against the Bridge's Board of Directors. | | | | bottomless pit of needs and wants. |
| Deep pockets, anyone? | | | | Sacred cows make the best hamburger. That seems |
| > A movie has bad guys driving a bulldozer. | | | | to be the battle cry of a chunk of the legal |
| Manufacturer of the bulldozer sues, because showing | | | | profession today, using con-man-style tactics as they |
| bad guys driving their product "disparages" the | | | | stake out anybody and everybody--especially those |
| brand's good name. | | | | with "deep pockets"--for picking. |
| > Man, armed with shotgun, is confronted by | | | | |