| Here are your big stories for the upcoming | | | | either Kobe or Shaq would go down with an |
| new season: | | | | "injury", the Lakers won more with Kobe OUT |
| | | | of the line-up, then when Shaq was out of the |
| - Kobe Bryant found guilty of rape. Lakers | | | | lineup. Much more, as this chart from will |
| are forced to "bend over" for Kobe's manhood | | | | illustrate |
| and finish with their worst record in 10 | | | | |
| years | | | | Plus/Minus splits for Shaq-Kobe |
| | | | |
| - Mark Cuban shocks the world as he gives | | | | Player Situation Off48 Def48 Net48 W L |
| away the Dallas Mavericks on his show, The | | | | |
| Benefactor! Although the show was cancelled | | | | Shaq with Kobe 104.0 93.5 +10.5 45 10 |
| before this episode was aired, the transfer | | | | |
| of ownership is legal and binding. | | | | Shaq w/out Kobe 95.0 91.2 +3.8 34 29 |
| | | | |
| - Vince Carter traded to Knicks! | | | | Kobe with Shaq 104.0 93.5 +10.5 45 10 |
| Unfortunately, trade had to be annulled after | | | | |
| Vince fails medical. After years of | | | | Kobe w/out Shaq 94.7 99.3 -4.6 22 36 |
| speculation, doctors confirm that Carter | | | | |
| indeed has no heart. | | | | Looking forward though, none of that matters |
| | | | as both players go into this season surround |
| Ok, so those may not actually pan out, but | | | | by a new starting 4. |
| here are some that we think will: | | | | |
| | | | Shaquille and Miami aside, the next biggest |
| - SHAQ catches latino Heat in Miami as the | | | | story will be how 5 of the 8 playoff teams |
| city gets playoff fever | | | | from the East may be below .500. We expect |
| | | | quality basketball to be hard to come by in |
| - James may be King, but it's Carmelo that | | | | the East. Your two other top teams will be |
| finds playoff gold for the 2nd year in a row | | | | Detroit and Indiana. We expect Isiah Thomas |
| | | | to make things interesting in New York, |
| - Vince Carter traded Knicks! Team then goes | | | | Lebron James to make highlight reels in |
| on to loss 15 straight and fall out of | | | | Cleveland, and Toronto to be Charlotte's 2nd |
| playoff contention as Vince's heart is called | | | | rival (after New Orleans) as they will be |
| into question. The focus of this year will | | | | battling to stay out of the cellar. |
| not be on the top two draft picks, but on | | | | |
| (arguably) the top 2 players in the league. | | | | The Sun may set in the West, but we feel that |
| Expect Kobe and Shaq to dominate national | | | | this team is on the rise, and ready to take |
| headlines as each will set out to prove that | | | | the next step forward. The Kings, |
| they were not the cause of the Lakers | | | | Timberwolves, Lakers and Spurs will be hard |
| collapse in the Final's against the Nets. It | | | | pressed to keep them out of the top 4 this |
| is a matter of public record that during | | | | year. With the possible exception of Seattle, |
| stretches of the last 2 seasons, that when | | | | every team should be fun to watch this year. |